What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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