Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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