I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Two words: nipple clamps
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