In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
