My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
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