it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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