I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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