If i come over, it means nothing
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
