You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Randomize
