If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
