Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
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