I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
