It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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