She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
