Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
