Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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