Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
