That's intense
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
