her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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