You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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