Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
