I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Randomize
