Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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