tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
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