super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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