The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
