so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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