I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
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I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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