I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I just sucked dick on a ferry
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
