Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
