I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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