He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
