He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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