ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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