Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
