sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
