I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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