How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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