apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
