I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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