Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
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