rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
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