Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
