didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
