Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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