I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
