Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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