You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
