I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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