Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
